Given that on my actual birthday we camped out, my birthday meal consisted of jerky, bars, and an applesauce pack for dessert. Although the applesauce was actually a tasty camping snack, I am so excited to pick up some real birthday dessert and celebrate Jason and my birthday’s “normal people” style.
There was a time in my life when I didn’t eat birthday cake. Or much of anything. I feared the calories and carbs and actually believed that I had to “earn” my cake by exercising more. I lived for years in this vicious cycle.
Warning: I have never told the story below to anyone…
One year I was out of town with some friends on my birthday and my friends got me this amazing large chocolate cake from Whole Foods (I LOVE chocolate… and Whole Foods). It was definitely meant to be shared with a lot of friends! My friends sang to me and I enjoyed a slice of cake with them. And then a slice the next day and the next day. I even had some with my breakfast. As I was leaving my friends told me to take the cake home. Well, on my 6 hour drive home I proceeded to actually eat sections of the cake (yes, while driving)! When I finally made it home to my house I still had a few slices left. I thought, why not just finish the damn cake and have it out of the house for good. So I ate the remaining slices and then was left with feelings of fullness BUT pure emptiness. I felt so ashamed, guilty, and embarrassed. I felt like a failure and I felt like there was nothing I could do but start over the next day by eating “clean” and over-exercising at the gym. Trust me: there were many cakes, chocolate bars, cookies, etc. that I binged on over the years.
There was a dark time in my life when I struggled so much with my body image, over-exercising, and food restrictions (which always led to binging and feelings of guilt). I learned that all of the body image issues and feelings of shame and disgust about my body weren’t true body image issues BUT a way of redirecting painful emotions onto my body in attempt to cope with trauma. I hated living this way so I quit competitive ultra-running, took up lifting weights, and spent years working with a Nutrition Coach to help guide me in learning how to fuel my body and give myself grace. I finally learned that I am worthy and deserve to feel great and look great. Since I started fueling my body (and eating > 300g Carbs) and dealing with the underlying issues of my body image, I am proud to say that I have never again lost control of my eating.
I want you to know that you are not alone on your journey. I have been there, and so many of my clients have been there too. Check out some of my clients testimonials: https://coachingwithabby.com/testimonials/ I believe that YOU too are worthy and deserve food that is both fuel and pleasure, balanced fitness, and body love. Reaching your goals will happen faster if you’re loving and fueling your body instead of battling against it. I promise. It’s amazing what happens when you start FUELING your body and STOP punishing yourself. And sure- maybe it takes longer than some quick fix diets, but then you get to live a life where you never have to restrict again.
It’s my last year in my 30’s. Life is too short to not enjoy the damn cake. So let’s make it a great year! Ready to stop battling your body and need help learning how to love and fuel it? Hit REPLY or click the link below to get started.
Cheering for you!
Fuel your dreams!
Coach Abby
Registered Dietitian Nutrition Coach & Personal Trainer
Hit the link below, and let’s chat, 100% free: https://coachingwithabby.com/apply-now/
